the earth exists two days at a time

thelittleturtleduck:

doctoroket:

kakarikovillage:

the snack that smiles back

children

what is wrong with this website

dogesexual:

do you type differently depending on the person you’re talking to

forget-the-alamo:

forget-the-alamo:

german sausage jokes are the wurst

apparently so was this text post

(Source: forget-the-alamo)

than-glitzenhamer:

notsiskysbusiness:

notsiskysbusiness:

dude if you’re not supposed to shut down your laptop with the power button then whats the point in having a power button

to turn it on

you need the power button to turn the computer on

did you just reply sarcastically to your own post

rneerkat:

musicalgravy19:

rneerkat:

i thought i saw a fruit flavored breath freshener but it must have been a fig mint of my imagination

I see what you did there! XD

have u considered work as a detective because i really believe u would do well with that career ur observational skills are amazing

acklesboner:

HOW CAN A SONG GIVE ME FUCKING COLD CHILLS AND MAKE ME TEAR UP

UGH

forever-classyx:

Oh my gosh people, be nice to your waiter/waitress, it’s not their fault that your food is cold or if it’s under cooked.  Be nice to the cashiers who are still training and can’t ring up your items as quickly as you want.  If a stranger smiles and says hello to you, smile and say hello back!  It’s just common courtesy, I don’t understand why people have to be so rude.

nepeta-walks-into-a-club:

we had a substitute teacher who kept saying he was a philosopher??? and somehow everyone was impressed by that and he said “ladies, if a guy wants to sleep with you and you say no and and he follows you around and keeps asking you no matter what you say, you should say yes, because he truly loves you” and everyone nodded at his wisdom and i just